Thursday Thirteen #7 - Thirteen Things devoutly to be wished

1. To be loved well

2. To have a cheerful spouse

3. To know thyself

4. and then to thine own self be true

5. To know God

6. To be halfway to heaven before the devil knows you’re dead

7. Good food always

8. To have a good dog that allows tummy rubs

9. To be happy

10. To be healthy

11. To laugh often

12. To understand the opposite sex

13. To have regular bowel movements

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Thirteen Reasons to go on Anxiety meds:

1. You’re so irritable you’re constipated

2. Your dog is scared of you

3. Your husband is scared of you

4. drinking hooch doesn’t help anymore

5. drinking cough syrup doesn’t help anymore

6. Even God won’t help you until you stop whinging

7. young kids make that high pitched squeal that’s like a spike through your brain

8. when you get the urge to make global warming WORSE, it’s time

9. your loved ones have to hide sharp things on you

10. when the birds chirping outside your window make you want to scream

11. you’re smoking 5 packs a day

12. AIR irritates you

13. when the answer to every question is Dr Kevorkian

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13 Reasons for my dog to poop on it.

1. It smells funny

2. ‘I like-a to poop-a iz make-a me feel good’

3. poop makes a good accent piece to the room

4. it’s better than potpouri

5. poop is good for rolling in

6. it’s good for making daddy mad

7. we can put the poop on a potter’s wheel and make a vase out of it

8. we can make meatloaf with a ’secret ingredient’

9. makes uncle blair’s carpet smell better

10. it’s something to rub people’s noses in

11. it’s better than a banana peel for daddy to step in

12. it’s totally gross, nuff said

13. it’s the only way a doggy can make a political statement

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i want another puppy dog!! my husband is so against it, because let’s face it, he does most of the puppy dog work around here. he doesn’t want to feed twice, pick up poop twice, etc.. i can’t blame him, but wouldn’t it still be twice as nice? all the cute puppy dogs on myspace are making me want want want. And I am of the belief that I should get what I want, regardless of my husband’s wants because i am female, and should be doted upon. that’s my two cents anyway.

1. Mist :: Gorillas in the Mist, that movie made me cry, all snot and tears in the movie theatre. I’m far too much of an animal lover to watch them killed
2. Eating :: lately I have been eating whatever i feel like eating, within the reason of availability hehe.. it’s my NEVER DIET AGAIN approach to dieting.
3. Beacon :: Those light houses that Christian artists paint all the time.
4. Speaker :: I’m a terrible public speaker, and talk really fast, and if i don’t have the subject matter ahead of time, i blabber inanely.
5. Episodes :: I’m still sooo ticked that they cancelled Gilmore Girls
6. Conference :: network marketing
7. Sneak attack :: I used to have a ferret that would hide and wait for me to come down the stairs in the morning, then run out like a flash and attack my ankles, the wee fiend.
8. Medic :: I actually think the medical profession is a bit of heaven, a place where you go to get fixed.
9. Web :: world wide..
10. 2008 :: hope for the future, changing my life.

Unconscious Mutterings, click click

Skinny Puppy (not the band), the picture for this week’s photohunt is of my dog, when she was a skinny puppy; right when we first got her. I don’t know WHY she was so skinny, she wasn’t tiny, by no means a runt. I’m thinking the wretched woman who raised her till weaning underfed her because she was big and she thought she wouldn’t sell. well she wasn’t too big for me, she’s not real big at all.. and when I saw said wretched woman feeding my little coco spaghettios that was enuff for me. I took her home. Now coco has a little pudge on her, and is a good weight, with her tiny little puppy pot belly.

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13 Reasons to get a Bon Jovi haircut…

1. It looked GREAT on Bon Jovi

2. So your hair will have a REASON to look bad.

3. There will be more of you to love.

4. Hairspray companies need help, what with all the environmental concerns.

5. Let’s face it, there was no greater contribution coming from the 80’s

6. Bon Jovi Rocks dude..

7. when somebody takes your picture you can stick your tongue out and make that devilish symbol with your hand.

8. it will give you an image to uphold

9. the shag haircut IS back, or i wouldn’t be writing this list hehe

10. shag haircuts are easy to grow so you can shave them off and make them into wigs for people that NEED Bon Jovi hair, then just grow another one..

11. you can say stuff like ‘no! watch the hair!’

12. nobody will ever be able to make fun of you ever again because you will be beyond reproach.

13. you can decorate your hair for Christmas.

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13 Reasons to Find a New Place to Live

ok, post edit… We’re not really moving and we love it here lol..

1. Because the people around here are totally whacko and they talk about me behind my back, don’t ask me how I know this.

2. I could say we need more space, but that would be so boring, and untrue. We are actually moving into a smaller place even though this one is overflowing with crap. As a matter of fact, I want to take the move as an opportunity to get rid of said crap.

3. Because the cats around here make Coco crazy, so they pee on our porch. I’m not sure that will change where ever we move, but still, it’s a reason. I would like to be cat pee free.

4. It’s too expensive to live in this nice froo froo area. Not that I want to move to skid row, but you know what I mean.

5. We could save money on taxes and strata fees. I’m not sure if that’s the same reason as number 4.

6. We can get out of debt from the profit from this place and buy something cheaper to live in.

7. I want a nicer kitchen for husband to cook in. He deserves a nice place to cook, bless his heart.

8. I want a jetted tub!! waaaa!! I just do, so where ever we end up living has to have a jetted bath tub.

9. I want an extra bedroom for my husband to have his ‘command centre’ in.. you know, the SEVENTY TWO computers he has.

10. I want a place that has no more ‘fixing up’ to do.. my husband SUCKS as a handy man, and I’ve lost my will to paint and decorate.

11. I want walls, not all windows all around me. I want to hang photos and art, etc. I think that’s prettier than looking at the people who live around you.

12. I don’t want to fix the roof on this place.

13. I don’t like it here anymore, and feel the need, the need for speed.

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we have an air filter that makes a snapping sound every now and then, like an electrical spark, and coco just goes nuts every time it happens. she flies off the couch and runs up to the air filter growling and jumping up and down trying to get at it. i really think she’s developing a neurosis about it. so now i’m making soft ‘coco nooooo’ noises, and she kind of looks at me all confused and then next time tries to be less obvious about wanting to kill the air filter, looking at me out of the side of her eyes. so, great, now i’ve added guilt to the neurosis. but it really was becoming a THANG and i didn’t want to have to take her to a doggy psychiatrist

Man oh Man, what a long night of work trying to get the front page up for badpuppydog.com Not really much works on it yet, but it’s there, and am I sore! And Coco was all over it… i had papers and my mouse pad on the couch with me, and all she did all night was tread upon my work. Now that I’m not working anymore she’s asleep over on the other couch. She just likes pushing my buttons. Anyway, feel free to add your doggy site to my top 100 list, since I kinda need 100 doggies to do that! And above all, have patience while I build the site, thanks so much y’all. Doggy lovers of the world unite!

When I got coco, I was totally heartbroken over my beloved poodle, crissy, dying after having her for 20 years. Crissy was my bestest friend, had been with me through thick and thin, rich and poor, divorce and marriage. She stood by my side faithfully no matter what was going on with my life. When I cried she would come and lick the tears from my face. I can’t tell you how much it hurt to lose her. So I immediately went out and got a puppy. Thus Coco entered into our lives. When I went to the breeder and saw her, she was the last left in the litter, I think it’s because she’s a little big for a chihuahua. Her and I regarded each other, and I picked her up and she immediately fell asleep in my arms. So I sat there for about an hour, just holding her, and slowly fell in love. It was the first and only dog we looked at in a search for a puppy. When I was young I dreamed of having a chihuahua that would let me lie down and cuddle her to my chest, and Coco lets me do that! It’s like a dream come true. Coco is very joyful, I know alot of chihuahuas are ill-tempered, but not her. She loves her life. She dances alot, trying to look cute for us. She has the prettiest face. And it’s like she knows it, she poses and bats her eyes at us, and talks, roo roo rooooooo. She talks so much I had to make her her own blog

so every time i get up from my computer, my ass nearly knocks over my iMac, coz i have to walk past it, and my ass is sizeable. tonight i very nearly sent it crashing to the floor and i let out a little squeek, and coco came out from under her pillow haven on the couch in such a hurry to see what was wrong. All the pillows went flying on to the coffee table and knocked over every glass on the table, and a bottle of wine. luckily it missed my camera which is amongst all the crap on the table, but what a kerfuffle, good thing the candles weren’t lit or things could have been a whole lot worse. that would be a VERY bad puppy dog who sets the house on fire.